No, It Isn't
by sparklylulz
Summary: Her eyes flicked up to him and in that moment she felt like she was seeing the real Sweets. The vulnerability in his face made her feel relief, almost as if she weren't the only one in pain. Sweets/Brennan set after 6.10


**A/N:** So over the past two weeks I have completely fallen in love with Bones. I'm not in love with the way she and Booth are _always_ tip toeing around each other, and I like the connection she makes with Sweets, so of course I have to pick the most off the wall couple. So I present an angst ridden hurt/comfort/romance/friendship thing. It takes place after 6.10. Enjoy (:

The title comes from the band (+44).

–

_**this desperation leaves me overjoyed.**_

–

Temperance Brennan prided herself on being a woman of logic, this was no secret to anyone who had ever spent more than two minutes in her presence. She made it plain that she did not enjoy matters of emotion or the heart because they always led to weakness, which made everything so much harder on her when Seeley Booth had appeared in her life. From the moment he had kissed her during their first case she had know that their relationship could only end one of two ways: with her in his arms or her alone. She realized now that she had been naïve in thinking he'd wait until her mind caught up to her heart. Now it was too late.

She felt foolish, as she had so many times in her life when it came to men, that she had allowed herself to be so exposed in front of him. She knew that was silly, seeing as how they had been through so much together, and yet she still couldn't just _be_ when he was around. She hated not understanding things, it wasn't in her nature.

She understood that Angela wanted her to move on, but she wasn't sure how to accomplish that goal. She compared every man she met to Booth, it was a near ingrained process, how could she just _stop_? Sometimes she got the feeling that her brain was simply too full, which wasn't logical seeing as she didn't use more than a small fraction of it. Yet, with Booth things were never logical for her.

She did the only thing she knew how to do; she went back to her bones. She knew that the only place she ever felt at peace was at the Jeffersonian. It was strange to most people that bones made her feel like herself, but it made sense to her, because when people were dead they couldn't judge her or make fun of her. When people were dead they _needed _her. That's probably why she liked the Jeffersonian so much, everyone there needed her.

–

_**this is where the road crashed into the ocean**_

–

Her tables were cleared of human remains for the time being until her phone would ring again, alerting her to another untimely death. She sighed, a sign of the long night she had spent with Hannah. She wasn't lying, she had an incredible alcohol tolerance; she barely even felt a buzz. That was unfortunate because now all she was left with were thoughts of Booth and Hannah and the beautiful children they would most likely have.

Her posture slumped against one of the metal examination tables, it finally felt like she was at the end of her emotional journey with Booth. Everyone was moving on. Angela and Hodgins were starting their family; Cam had her whole world with Michelle; Daisy even had a strange affair going on with Sweets; and now Booth, Booth had Hannah. It was merely her that was alone in the world of the Jeffersonian.

She had half hoped to see Micah, but she remembered that it was his night off, meaning that it would be up to her to work herself through this. At the end of the day it always seemed that she relied on herself. For once she wanted to be able to have someone else hold her up. The first tear slipped down her nose and landed on the table with a splash, several others quickly following it.

She hated crying, more than she hated talking about her feelings. The tears on her cheeks wouldn't stop, but it wasn't as if she really even wanted to stop them. It was time that she felt this agony as it ripped through her body in the form of sobs. It was all her fault she was here, Booth had given her the chance and she had never been able to give him anything in return.

"Dr. Brennan?"

–

_**and my mouth is filled with blood from trying not to speak**_

–

She recognized that voice, but it wasn't the one she wanted to hear. She stood up quickly, knocking the tears from her cheeks as Sweets made his way towards her. She wanted to sigh, because she knew this would lead to an uncomfortable talk about feelings and Booth and she just didn't think she could handle that tonight.

"Sweets." She said simply, eyes not meeting his. He was talking a few tentative steps towards her, probably because she was the most unapproachable person on the planet.

"Uh, are you okay?" He asked lamely, and she scoffed in-spite of herself. _This _was precisely why she hated psychology and found it to be a waste of time.

"I am simply having a moment of emotion, but it's over and I'm fine. Thank you for asking." She spoke crisply, gathering her bag and jacket, ready to leave and before Sweets could take the opportunity to riffle around in her head.

"It's about Booth, isn't it?" He asked, upon seeing her confused look he continued, "He, uh, told me about the other night."

She felt like her heart had caved in. First he had told Hannah, but now Sweets knew. Who would be next? He had no right to go around telling people about that night. She had been weak in front of him because she trusted him, now she was humiliated. She felt anger surge through her, she was full of so much pain.

"Of course he did." She spoke simply. It seemed a common occurrence that she often wanted to say more than she allowed herself.

Sweets was looking at her, not with pity, more a look of sadness. Almost as if he could understand her pain, but how could he? Yet, they weren't so different, were they? They both experienced very traumatic childhoods, they were only at home at the Jeffersonian, they both found solace in Booth. Something about the way he looked caused her to feel the way she had in Booth's car the night she had admitted that she _needed _him. The tears were slipping out again and she couldn't stop them anymore. She was finally tired of being strong.

"How could he? He knew... _everyone_ knew that we were supposed to be together!" She cried, "He tried so many times, but I never... I was so cold. I was afraid of everything." The tears splashed against the table once more, as Sweets watched her break down for him completely. "That night, I gave him everything I have. But it was too late, Sweets. He doesn't want- he has Hannah now. Everyone has someone else. Angela and Hodgins; Cam and Michelle; Booth and Hannah; even you and Daisy!" She hiccuped.

"I am all alone." She whispered, the whole in her chest ached with the sorrow of the truth in her words.

Sweets placed a cautious arm around her, which she relaxed into. "Temperance, you're not alone. They all need you." He said kindly, causing her to snort into his shoulder.

"No, they need my excellent knowledge and ability to identify corpses." She said sadly, but she felt Sweets shake his head above her.

"That's not true. When I came here the first thing I observed was that all the friendships came before the work. It's why you all love it so much here. It's why I love it so much here. I like to think that we're a kind of family." He admitted softly above her, giving her a light squeeze.

–

_**it rises all around me and now we're barely breathing**_

–

Her eyes flicked up to him and in that moment she felt like she was seeing the real Sweets. The vulnerability in his face made her feel relief, as if she weren't the only one in pain. Her arm snaked it's way around his waist and they held each other in a long silence, enjoying the ability to rely on someone else.

"And you're wrong... about Daisy." He said, breaking the silence, causing her to jump a little. She raised an eyebrow at him, because she had caught Daisy in his office just over a week ago. Things seemed like they were going very well.

"I, uh, told her that her career wasn't worth being placed over my love. I suppose you'll think I'm wrong." He chuckled a little, looking down to her pondering face.

She thought about his words for a moment, because it was almost like something Booth would say. A life without putting yourself out there wasn't a way to truly live. He wore his heart on his sleeve, as did Sweets, however it appeared that Sweets' heart had heavier protection around it.

"No, I don't think you're wrong, Sweets. I have _been_ her, so one day she'll realize that she was wrong, but hopefully she'll get a happy ending." She spoke sadly, looking down at the floor. She felt his hand push her jawline up and she looked up at Sweets.

"You know, you still can have a happy ending. Maybe it's not with Booth, but that doesn't mean you should stop trying." He spoke softly, "There is someone who's gonna love you for all of you, despite your icy outer shell. I've seen how beautiful you can be, Dr. Brennan, and I'm sure I'm not the only-"

Before he could finish she had turned to face him, wrapping her hands in his jacket and pulling him towards her in a highly illogical motion, planting her lips against his. Kissing Sweets was different than kissing Booth. Booth had been very experienced, which he flaunted quite a lot; Sweets on the other hand, kissed with an innocence that she found she liked. He was gentle, his hand tangling itself in her short hair, the other wrapped around her waist, pulling her in.

She finally felt okay, like this was enough. Sure, she didn't love him, not like Booth, but it was enough to finally move on. She was tired of worrying about her heart; Booth was right, there was no life without taking risks. Somehow, she had never picture that Sweets of all people would be her risk, but now that it was happening, she didn't mind that much.

They broke apart, his eyes searching her face for some indication that she was going to filled with regret. However, she didn't regret anything, it was a pointless way for her to live. She ran her fingers along his jaw, he really did have excellent bone structure.

"You're thinking about bones, aren't you?" He asked, smirking. She smiled softly, because at some point he had paid her enough attention that he finally understood her.

"How'd you know?" She asked, still trailing his jaw.

"Your eyes always light up when you see a set of bones." He whispered, leaning his face against his. She felt the compulsive need to clarify things, like always.

"I still love him, a part of me always will." She spoke bluntly, and he grinned that beautiful smile he had at her.

"Yeah, I'm a psychologist, I knew that already. I love your honestly though." She scowled a little bit.

"I still hate psychology." She spoke simply, causing him to laugh. He leaned to whisper into her ear, "Maybe I can change your mind." He said huskily.

"I doubt it, I've always been firm in my set of beliefs which can be witnessed through- Oh." She paused, then raised an eyebrow at him, "You were being seductive."

"Yes, I was." He whispered. She smiled, pulling his face back down to hers. She found that she didn't care what Booth would think; or how Angela would be in shock and the way Cam would ask how it was being with someone so young. Right now she just needed Sweets and that was enough for her.

They'd found themselves in each other and so at the end of her story her happy ending came with the psychologist and not the FBI agent. If there was a God, he sure had a sense of humor, she reflected as she sat next to Sweets as the team celebrated another case solved. She lay her head on his shoulder, his arm wrapping around her and finally giving her a place that she could just _be_.


End file.
